Sheela ki jawani

The train came at the same time everyday and it went tak tak tak and then the shrill whistle signifying its presence. Sheela loved the sound because it promised to  her the whole new wide world. It promised and beckoned to her like a forbidden lover to the delights and mysteries of the city away away from this village , one of the nameless faceless ones which dotted the country. Sheela ,dreamt about running , fleeing away from the drudgery from this very existence where she was scorned, ridiculed. The sameness of her life , her routine where she woke up , did her chores and then did the same repetitive work day after day had bored her and it  kindled her spirit into doing something different, outlandish in running away to the city which allured her to its mystery. Every one who boarded the train on Friday's came back with forbidden stories to tell of the bright city which never slept and twinkled with lights where night was brighter than day. Of people who were bright , colorful , women who drove scooters and some even drove cars dressed in clothes of men. She so wondered how it would feel to wear a trouser and a shirt leave her hair open like in the movies , hair free to whirl up in the wind without ma's forever admonishment to oil it and to wear it in a plait. To be dressed demurely , always in those drab ghagra cholis , covering her chest which had suddenly had a growth spurt,covered forever tightly with a duppatta. Her mother was forever scolding her , she did not know what made people stand stop and stare at her. Yes the arrangement of the features was the same as everyones, maybe the kohl did make her eyes look bigger but nothing untoward. Her mother whispered in the night to her father that it was time for her to get married and be sent away to her in-laws place. Her mother's far- off cousin 's uncle's son who lived in the next village was a peon that too in the court and had a government job.
Sheela wondered whether marriage was the answer . From one repititive existence to another. the same old mundane life swapped and then maybe something which was done at night about which no- one talked but all giggled about . That, and then nine months later the dai and then a child was born. Sheela wondered about the mystery , the things which were done under the blanket and the only time the newly weds slept together up on the roof and then later all together in a line as if waiting for the bus. Oh , I wish someone would explain what transpired. Was it a kiss or did something bloom as shown in the hindi movies Sometimes,the matinee show shown by Chajju lal in the maidan were a bit racy and had the scenes where ma' shut her eyes! She so wanted to know when lips met , did the birds twitter and what did the rising sun mean? One day.
Right now, she was planning her escape to the city and needed to save a bit more money . Even Deputyji said she was 'sayaani' and could do a lot if she had been taught and had studied beyond her primary classes. what could a tenth pass do?

Sheela planned to do a lot. She had even thought about running away to the city , start working in one of the large kothies and then study side by side . she so wanted an education to learn English, to be able to speak passably , to be a modern woman and not be a bhenji. She wanted to break away from the mold which bound her to be a woman forever of the village forever shrouded in the dust of the countryside , to be born and to die forever in this ghagra and then move forward one step to the ghoongat signifying her marriage status. From one shackle to another.Three more sundays and she would have her money saved from baba's weekly two rupee handout. Channo , her comrade in arms who knew about the plan was going to give her 20 rs and that would help her tide her till she found her job.
It was so simple and with that  thought she drifted off to sleep , knowing the first rays of sun caressing her cheeks would mean waking up to hurried ablutions in the nearby fields ( before the men came) and then a watered down excuse of a tea and then the same chakki peesing!
The bounce in her steps the next morning , the heart which beat a different tune , the mysterious smile which lingered on her face all added to her allure. Everyone looked at her and passed knowing glances saying , jawaan ho rahi hain,is ki to aab gauna hona chaiye.. The passage of rite from girl to woman was imminent and on the doorstep.They didnt know about her contemplations, of the world she was building piece by piece and the castles which she aspired to….
Her world was far away from this dusty broken roads which had only one direction to a life of slavery . She looked at the dark clouds overcast which promised the first rains of the season and were clouding the bright fierce sun and were going to hit the parched cracked earth which wanted deliverance from its drought. It was akin to her desire to break free , and she took it to be a favorable omen.
Sheela did her chores and life was remarkably easy to get by, when she knew deliverance was a few weeks away . She thought about her family but she knew by the increasing frequency of talks  of Misraji that she would be married off come season time. The ugly Misraji with a mole on his cheek and his oiled stringy hair made her vomit. She didnt want him. He inspired no flutters no emotions , no stirring and no birds sang when she had met him. Channo, her friend cautioned her , gave her reason ,logic afraid that her flights of fancy would be the death of her . No panchayat had ever let a girl escape, death was certain , even if it was not swift it was quiet. People just stopped talking about what happened to the deceased,but Sheela knew she had to make the step.
Someone had to bring about the winds of change, someone had to take the first step to step on the train away away form this village , from the normalcy to the horizon which beckoned her. She had to move step forward and alight the steps, move to the unknown which so desirable and seductive. She would find love on her terms, find someone who when she met would make he birds sing and the sun rise….
Her day arrived, with mixed bags of emotions she ran away to the station , clutching her small potli defiantly dressed in the most daring choli she owned with money hidden away in her bosom.
When she took the first step into the cabin , the music which she heard was Sheela ki jawani from the latest potboiler from Bollywood..and she knew just knew she had arrived.