rhea's dilemma

Rhea’s Dilemma: What every mid 20yr old, thirty something faces in the so –called modern cities of Punjab. How to produce the rightful heir? The pressures to reproduce/procreate the ‘waaris’ are insurmountable. There is an impasse’ between the old and the new where one is stuck at the thresh-holds of having a healthy child v/s a male child

The constant pressures, the taunts and the mutterings and the not so subtle comments had reached a level where had Rhea wanted to run away. Kind phrases , slight hints of doing it in a particular way and at a particular time of the month and eating an apple a day in the morning as it ensured a male child were sound-bytes that had been droning her ear ever since Karan and she had celebrated their first wedding anniversary.

Dam it, she said to herself as she adjusted her pale blue chikankari dupatta that had been starched to perfection by Weldon aunty ji and simultaneously invoking a prayer to babaji urging him to take care of her whenever she would go to meet to the local God man, a favourite of all mothers-in-law, since he promised a100% guarantee. The appointment was not far.

Carrying a huge basket of fruits, including Californian apples and Chinese pears and a silver thali laden with Nathoo’s mithai covered by a co-ordinated pink tissue and a cloth pouch filled with an offering (minimum 10,000 Rs, Sheela said) mummy ji steps into the car shouting for Rhea as Sant ji was said to be very punctual.

God! This girl,she must be applying her sun screen. Her obsession with being white….. If only, she would produce a male heir, all my problems would vanish after which I can die in peace thought Prakash Kaur doyen of the ladies club sector9.

Who will look after Lalji and Rhea in their old age? hai mera munda’Our family name , zameen ….izzat.

In a silence thick enough to be cut with a knife, the duo move to Zirakpur with the tenacity of An Indian general leading his troops to fight against the Pakis.The move to the battle post sorry Dera of Khuwasianwala Babaji, where woman from all over flock to be blessed with the golden child!

Forget the fact that it’s got to do with the sperms or heaven forbid! The laadla munda! Never ever suggest this to a mother-in-law thought Rhea. She a product of the finest schools and the best college of the country had no choice over this, just produce the rightful heir and all systems were go.

Babaji sitting in an opulent gaudy room with temperatures freezing (enough to freeze off all body parts) thought Rhea with a giggle SShh!! Mummy ji glared at her and shoved her to get blessed by his liver-spotted podgy hands. Babaji, giving her the look over instructs her “Beta, mix this in Kaka’s milk at night” The sachet which is a miracle drug equivalent to apni ol’ little blue pills.

Babaji’s success rate has all of Chandigarh under his sway, so Rhea goes along with it and placates Karan to try the holy powder. The night gives away to the morning and success is guaranteed; there is nothing as failure in Prakash Kaur’s house.She waits for the door to open and mentally promises extra Prasad to bhaiji and a gold kara to Babji nine months hence. What, if the elusive heir is born?

old age , hai budhapa'

Old age home means...

I know you know the meaning of this because you are on the net and have a reasonable level of IQ; you don’t need an English lesson last of all from me! It so happened that I viewed a program on TV on Old age homes and the rising number of these establishments. You can actually sort them out by city (courtesy bing) So, go ahead book yourself a place.

I belong to the old school of thought where one is duty bound to look after one’s elders and not shunt them to these establishments. The rising number upsets me. Why have we started to shirk from our responsibilities? Why is that we (this present Gen-x) shy away from old-age the approaching infirmities? Why have we started sprouting these mundane statements like...we are too busy, there is no good help these days, they demand too much attention.

Is this a sign of not facing reality? Is it because we shy away from anything which even suggests the first sign of wrinkles and mortality? The road will be travelled by us, make no mistake. Old age, death is inevitable as is the path on which we tread from times of Manu.

Question yourself, in regards to the inhumane treatment meted out to our elders who are shunted out because they talk too much or demand incessantly and whose reason for existence is justified till they don’t will their property.

I know you all are going to say this is shocking, but my dears this is how society operates. Sorry, to have hurt your feelings.

Indians have opinions about everything. No matter how ill informed, one-sided or self-serving it is we have an opinion. It is a national past-time… anybody who is worth their 2 rupee knows this so. What do you think? Are these institutions needed for our society (the framework of which is deteriorating) or should we uphold our traditional ways of looking our parents?

Think of yourself shunted into a sterilised, falsely cheerful, pastel coloured room with a few of your possessions scattered and tables lined with essential medicines to keep you going ……waiting for the nurse to come to break the eerie silence.

Rhea's morning.. thoughts

She looks in the mirror (reminiscent of MJ’s man in the mirror!!)And she shrieks, the minute clean pore Neutrogena mask has made her face look like a monkey’s bottom!!! She stares in amazement and starts crying... big fat tear drops rolling down her crimson cheeks and she shouts for … Ice and in a pace that would put the reigning 100mt.Olympic gold medallist Bolt to shame she whips out her Emergency Body Shop Gel mask, gently puts it on.

Rhea invokes a prayer to Babaji and promises 10 japji sahibs so that this redness goes down! She hurriedly wears her new suit-the latest creation from Abu-Jani white on white, subtlety personified. No one, in Chandigarh would have anything close to it: the thought brings a smile to her troubled face. Oh Lord, she still has to pay for it and she is overdrawn for this month. Extra cajoling and love for Ranbir tonight. Getting her sad face on (make up has to be subtle, eyes more expressive with the right lip colour from Guerlain) along with the hair done in a low bun by Asha with a little puff in the centre so that the glasses can be perched absolutely right under the dupatta.Diamonds flashing of the right cut and carat in their platinum setting (gold is so passé’) clutching her new cream on cream Judith Leiber she walks out of her house tossing instructions to Sheila. Pick up the children, give sahib his lunch, get flowers from Khullars for tonight and don’t forget book me for a pedicure at Iris.

Glancing at the time, wondering how time flies she steps on the gas to reach for the gurudwara.It is so important to be on time. Her parents had always ingrained into her a sense of discipline and punctuality. Rhea walks in the cynosure of all eyes, ramrod straight (Thanks to all those years of deportment classes) to “matha teko”. She sits down in the middle and mentally thanks herself. Joined by her coterie of friends who ooh, and aah her on her suit and her bag ….they all take Prasad from bhaiji after blotting it on their napkins.Oh so much ghee... extra cardio, for sure tomorrow.

This is the best time when they can smile and glance at the same time while keeping a solemn face and gossiping about everyone. The daughter-in-law who hurriedly picked up all the pashminas and the diamonds before the daughters could come home and poor Mrs K. shifted to the annexe in sector4 by the family as she was cramping their social life .Sad, that people who give us birth and make us who we are end up spoiling life for us.

Rhea stays for the requisite half an hour like a Prima Donna, because more time spent would lead to diluting the mystery she loves to create. Elusiveness, deflection are important in the society we live in, the walls we have created are fragile and are held up high by values which are weak and are measured not by honour, integrity but by the money, power, material things one has .And, heaven forbid if one is seen to be desi because shunning the roots and adopting a western lifestyle means one has arrived.

Rhea's Mornings...

Oh my God! It’s going to be 10.30am and the stupid maid hasn’t given me my chai... Sheila where are you? Get the tray ready... I want a separate set with my favourite. Earl grey dip-dip and arre... where is the cook? Bhaiyaji... What did u give the children in their Tiffin? Did u pack the biscuits I had picked up from nix’s?? Accha, chalo... Jaldi call Sheila... has she ironed my suit? Where is my cell? Oh, you didn’t put it for charging. Muttering to herself the commission one pays for these maids to the chappie in Delhi horrendous! And she can’t even get my things ready... have you called Asha to do my hair?? Yes meme sahib she meekly replies with half a smirk.

Iron my shirt the white one, the mukaish one. And then for the bhog get the new suit out which was delivered yesterday. Why, oh why do people have to die in the summer and then the bhog?? I think I’ll enter at 1pm when the kirtan has finished and the Ardaas is going on. I think the bvlgari shades would look good rather than the Ferragamo one’s .That makes my tint look better. Sheila, Pani Bharo... and I’ll have my muesli with chilled milk with a boiled egg... Give the yolk to Simba pl. You can’t trust these servants to do anything right... She’ll keep on eating on if you don’t keep a check .Damn, this Rujuta Diwekar and her new diets.. Ahhaa the aroma of aloo paranthas with butter melting on top.. You know that song...”Kahaan Gaye who din…..” That’s the story of my life! Getting ready and pampering one self is such a task. The finest of scrubs and the new magical regime by shiseido to protect oneself from this harsh sun...…it’s horrendous how women let them selves get all tanned and the pigmentation.Eeks!

Rhea walks out of her bathroom half an hour later in a cloud of Allure…..

p.s. catch Rhea in action tomorrow...when she makes her entry for the bhog at the sector 8 gurudwara at1.10