Thursday, July 16, 2015

Happiness , khushi

Happiness

This does not read as a sermon, nor is it a capsule of gyaan that I am going to unravel so you get Happiness 101, nor is it an app one can download or an introduction to a series of lecture where by the end would read as, to tap more into the happy space send Rs 500.
Just a rambling, as always that I type here thinking some one somewhere would read. It’s the holy month of Ramadan, its the moth where perpetually all the village folk are attending some mela, travelling to “ jagahs” and taking part in the seva of the pir sahib. All this is to be happy, khush as they say. Talking to a laborer yesterday, I asked itni garmi mein chutti, so he replies kya farak padta hain, baccho keliye (what difference does it make, if I miss a days work; its all for my children’s happiness).
Such is the story of our lives. Be it anyone, rich or poor or old or young. We all keep on looking for the next step in our lives, thinking the next turn, the turning or the next year or the future is going to bring us happiness. For a simple layman, happiness is thought as good life, prosperity, freedom from suffering, well being, joy and pleasure. We, humans keep on searching for this elusive emotion from others, we get married, thinking the partner will fill the void, the new car, the bigger house, the fancier clothes, the children we have. They give us joy and we face numerous obstacles along the way. We tell ourselves, it will get better when they are older, they will look after us and we will be happy. Then we get frustrated with adolescence years, and how we must deal with them, the societal pressures, peer pressures that the kids face, the competition, school, colleges the rat – race, but we console ourselves thinking that all will be fine, when our spouse gets his /her act together, when we have a nicer flashier, swankier, bigger car, or the next vacation, or when we will have time to pursue our interests when we retire.
The truth is  that there is no better time to be happy than right now.
You will shake your head, smirk and make fun and say yeah right, how does she know what kind of battle I’m fighting or what my problems are. They all are momentous, they all seem to be collapsing on your head, and the fragile house of cards you’ve built seems to be tumbling down. Every obstacle, every pitfall is there to make us stronger and I sound like those inspirational positive hogwash gurus sprouting everywhere. Vaise could start one of those Bibi ashrams, on second thoughts, but amassing wealth or unaccountable property isn’t what makes me happy, books and coffee do!
Happiness isn’t the Leprechaun gold available at the end of the rainbow, its in every step, every minute of the day. Its your prerogative how to tackle what life dishes out to you. They say revenge is a dish best served cold, so why give the advantage to life to better you and to dangle happiness as the prize at the end of the day.
Bliss, contentment, happiness, peace the by words of modern life, which has spawned a billion dollar industry is all with in us. Stop waiting for school to end, to lose that extra weight, for you to get a job, to get married. To have kids, to wait for them to grow up to deliver you happiness. Stop living from Monday to Friday elusively waiting for the weekend to blow your steam, do it on a Monday, banish those blues, don’t sink your self in the coffee. It’s an ongoing process and by downloading an app, or by reading the new how to get happy in ten steps book just off the press is not going to make you happy till YOU decide to be. Its not in anyone’s hands nor is going to be given by as many gifts, they all are transient.
Ultimately, it all lies in your hand.
Do not wait for spring to come, don’t be the happy prince, love the fall, embrace the winter, welcome the cold, revel in spring and yes enjoy the summer (however killing it is!). I probably whine the maximum about garmi, but being in this sultry heat makes me appreciate the comforts of the air conditioning.
An eight month old lying on the gunnysack plays in complete gay abandon, happy and blissful, while his mother works nearby in the shed.  She is happy, he’s in the shade, and safe; that is her nazariya. But ask someone in the city they would want a baby monitor, a maid climate controlled temperature and color sensitive toys, to hone the child’s mental faculty plus the latest soothing Disney tune to lull him or her to sleep. Who is happier?

Here is where we need to thank what we have and to enjoy rather than look for utopia that is elusive and no one ever captured it.

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