Arm Candy 1

I’ve had an epiphany! All those pictures that I’ve been taking are all wrong. Wrong! Wrong! Wrong! They should have been with me posing on one side with my head inclined on the precise angle of 45 to one side and I should have had my hair all straightened falling like a cascade and the color should have been the luscious brown, number 546 just like Sonam or is it Aishwarya Rai. Was I supposed to glow or strobe or highlight? These new multi fangled words kept on confusing me, was I supposed to enhance, make myself glow or just be true to myself.

It just wasn’t easy being the new bahu to be of the Kapoor khandaan and I was failing miserably! I was a simple sunder susheel tikao girl form a middle class family of belonging to Malviya Nagar who was chosen by the heir apparent of the Kapoor khandaan, Ram. And, the reason was as simple as the difference between chalk and cheese, I had intrigued ram and he wanted to marry me to prove a point. He loved me and thus the match was made. Today was just a normal dinner that I was attending but it was with everyone at the Delhi Gymkhana Golf Club, and I was afraid . I didn’t know how to dress, talk like them or even pose like them. All the Facebook and instagram pictures had them smiling with perfect eyes and lips coordinated, the nude lips with a hint o f glow and the winged eyeliner along and the subtle cheeks. How was I ever going to achieve those? All I had was a simple Ponds cream and a kajal and yes some lipstick in the perfect shade of Lakme brown that everyone swore by! And my suit was also borrowed from one of the It girls who was my best friend from med school!

Well the chikankari would look perfect and silver bangles with Mama’s jhumkis and nails painted red (it was the color) and she would have her straight hair that was everyone’s envy.

I was ready and waiting and wore the last thing that scared the shit out of me, the heavy-duty two-carat diamond ring that was hidden every night in Mama’s godrej almirah in the safe. She had palpitations every time I wore it and kept on warning me that I should be careful with it. They didn’t have anything as expensive as this!

Ram was going to reach on dot at 8:30 pm and had already messaged me to be ready. I was now the proud owner of all things Apple! Funny, how I had jumped from Micromax Lava to Apple. I was still scared of using it ,but now was hooked on it ! The interesting thing was my phone bill that was so obscenely high, Wi-Fi usage was killing and I felt embarrassed in ask Mama again for more money.  Internship was just barely covering my expenses; I needed waxing, threading, hair straightening once in awhile and shoes, clothes, accessories, traveling money and now the weirdest expense. I needed lingerie, for us it was always Bhaiyaji, bra dikaho and panty was just mumbled in two colors black and white. Only a few years ago living in the hostel had I dared to the interesting cuts and colors but now with being engaged to Ram, I so needed the fluff and the frilly lace. Not the bleached whites that mama said were the main stay and decent.

I so wanted indecency, the beautiful sexy lingerie and the lacy stuff, however I drew the line at the most uncomfortable things that Ismat sweared by.  She was a doll, and my soul mate but I drew the line at those thongs she wanted me to wear.

Oh ho, getting back to Ram who was reaching in five minutes, I quickly went the bathroom, checked myself and put my hair back from one ear.

And then took a selfie. And just realized I had been taking the pictures wrong. I needed to strut my boobs out, make a duck face slightly and open my eyes as if they were popping out and perfect picture. Well, I did all this and sent it to Ram. Sometimes, I wondered why they named him Ram, just like out of Ekta Kapok K Kk serials that had all the ladies busy!

Ram messaged, an emoticon, and I smiled! This was my hero, and even if I were nervous he would ease my fears. I ran outside and there he was in the fancy two seat convertible silver Beemer as he told me I had to call it. And, then I remembered I dint have my potli , I needed my touch up lipstick and stuff without which I couldn’t function ( croc in for the killer headaches, tissues, safety pin that Mom swore by , lipstick , and kajal  and always ,always taxi money ) . No girl travelled without this amount. This was as sacred as Bhagwan ke paise, after Nirbhaya I made sure I had this amount with, and if touched I replenished it again.

I sat next to him, and Ram looked at me and touched my hair.

You look so sexy, yaar. I love your hair and your ethnic looks. Come give me a kiss.

Please, let’s go, mama will be looking.

Uff, you and your old-fashioned desi ideas, move on with the time, Ram started the car and I lurched ahead

I wore my seat belt and thought what was old fashioned? Did the South Delhi girls kiss in front of their parents, and allow their fiancées to touch them. I did like when he touched me, and I wanted more. I was probably the only 23year old virgin Doc doing her internship who knew all about the human body and chemical reactions and why hormones made me go up in a tizzy but failed in practical’s.

What a poor joke, I had made, needed to text this to Ismat a.s.a.p. . Ram was talking about who all were going to be there.  We will be there in ten minutes you can straighten yourself.

I checked my hair, and touched my lipstick again.  Please meet everyone nicely and don’t talk too much to Abhinav. He is my cousin, but I don’t like when you and he keep on talking. But I just talk to him about books, or medicine. He’s a doctor, so am I!

That’s all don’t worry.

What was his problem? Is he always going to be like this? Why cant I have a conversation with who ever I wanted?

We both walked in , I touched my ring again , hoping it was upright . Last time, Mom had lovingly fixed it; I knew I was being subtlety corrected. I needed to learn my Ps and q’s but what the hell!

None of them was a doctor and there and they just knew how to smile and talk about the next Louboution marriage with sabyasachi and the new line of shoes or the fact that a Sunny married to Tina who was Sharma auntie’s daughter was booking the new rose gold phone for her from NY. And, for them the Syrian crisis was just a way to have another social event and hold placards wearing tight white shirts and nude nail paint w the basic blue jeans.

Uff, focus and smile and think about Ram and how good he was to her. He loved me  he loved me. And the doors opened.

Hello everyone!  I was taken aback by the theme, why was everyone in desi chic? It seemed I was transported to a back to the roots revivalist khadi save Bharat scene. Everyone girl worth her false eyelashes was wearing simple plain, cream or black or white on white kurtas with these flowing chunnis. And enough silver to make Chamkila look dull.

I fitted and my inner diva did a handstand and a tumble, I did not stand out. Thank you Ismat!!

I was now a sherni, and knew I was on equal footing. Suddenly, Abhinav walked in and I knew I wouldn’t be bored amongst the crowd.

I just didn’t even want to go there, I felt more comfortable with Ram’s cousin, could speak to him as we connected but was marrying Ram.

Hormones, my dear the inner diva said.

Shut up please, I am so not talking to Abhinav today.

He walked in and came straight towards me pulling a chair next to me. I had no clue what to do, talk be normal or be quiet and listen to what Ram had said.

I need to talk about something with you later; do you think you could slip out to the other room in a while?

I didn’t know what this was all about. Last we had spoken about dengue and the world and politics and whether Trump would have a shot at the presidency! Nothing as such  that required one to go to another room.

Conversation was light, with the right notes , laughter ,drinks were flowing , it all started with vodka and the appetizers were there but ignored , they never fit in with the current diet of no carbs, only protein eat sushi diet that was followed by the babes. Abhinav was very strange today, he kept on looking at me as if I had sprouted another nose or had three eyes. This was making me uncomfortable. I decided to resolve what was bothering him and excused myself from the table by mumbling loo, five minutes, I will be just back.

Going into the other room, I kept on waiting, wondering whether Abhinav would take the hint. Soon, he came in. I observed him carefully as he walked the door. I knew that time was running out but suppressed the urge to check my watch. I took a deep breath and started counting in reverse under my breath, “ ten ,nine , eight , seven… “ This guy just looked weirder today. He kept on looking straight at me and came really close.

I think you are making a big mistake by marrying Ram.

I would make you happy and keep you smiling.

I promise and before I knew it, he had taken me in his arms and we were kissing . Hot blooded, passionate and funny part is the noses fit not like the bumpity bump with Ram.

Should it be love and the castle in the air or ground reality and stability?