Aap or Hum

Lahore 

21st Dec.201

11:02am

Dear Diary,

life is the same everywhere , here or there , at every place on this planet . the human psyche is the same , we all want the elusive , forgetting what we have and the treasures we have in our fist. Always,looking for the unreachable . Ammi , has been dropping silent hints that I need to try again and have  another baby ; which Inshallah this time would be a boy. I am happy ,contented, Ahmed is happy so why cant we be left alone to live our lives? The pressure, the subtle hints, the tactics, the carrot dangled in the form of a bigger solitaire , money .. 

uff! I wish i could just shout loud , this stifles me. what happened to fatima? Isn't she important? finally I have regained my life back.. the lost stomach , the droopy boobs finally inshape. The 3 am crazy feedings, the feeling of being a cow and a milk machine.. the cries, the fever, tonsils, rash . I mean all the totkas are known ,every dai's secret method to fix colic is known . But, the pressure to produce the heir to the name. 

Aren't my dolls heiresses in their right? And now I have to go visit someone who will help me with this .. do i give in or its quieter and the tension , hassle is less to fight. Hmm.. hit the speed dial to Allah ..

Chandigarh

21st Dec 2012

3:33pm

Dear Diary,

Urghhhhh! why oh why ? why do i have to have another baby? why cant one child be enough? don't they worry about the population explosion? Don't they the earth is going to explode? hello, how are we going to be sure ? when are you going to ask me, you  nincompoop?